Monday, May 29, 2006

Tuber Goes Big .. & other stuff

First things first. Sincerest condolences to friends & fam of Adam Barron, the kayaker who, at this time, is still missing & presumed deceased, in Vallecito Cr. Colorado. I absolutely hate to hear this kind of news & my heart is with those who are left in the wake of this tragedy. I never knew Adam, but still feel the sadness of losing a member of the team. Our community is, after all, so small & tight-knit that we are all only a degree or two of separation from knowing each other. To my friends who knew him & those involved in the recovery efforts, I'm with ya ... Peace.


It ain't often you'll catch hot-off-the-press tubing news on TRL. The Inner Ring might hate on me for posting about a tuber -- I hear the voices, I know the speculations -- but I'M THE DECIDER & I decide what's best for TRL, & what's best for TRL is for me to post about loco tubers. Besides, this is just too good to go unannounced .. enjoy:

From Eric B:
" Rolf Kelly ran 82-foot Metlako Falls on May 26, 06, paddling, no, make that
RIDING a Goodyear innertube. As Rolf stood at the lip contemplating his line,
I stood across the canyon waiting with a camera in hand. Rolf looked up at me
with that look on his face that said 'Whaddaya think? Should I go?' I replied with
a fist pump followed by yelling 'Rolf, you're the man!' With little or no
hesitation Rolf sat on his tube that he just pumped by hand with the bicycle
pump he borrowed from Todd Anderson. I have never witnessed someone commit
to a waterfall of that size so quickly before. He literally sat in the tube
and with a few bicycle kicks and backstrokes, he was in the main current
committed to Metlako Falls. Coming off the lip he went for the rocking
chair style boof (a technique so new and advanced most innertube waterfallers
are unfamiliar with it) He boofed and went for the gold. He almost
stomped it and held tight onto his tube, but on impact -- which Rolf said
'was f##king hard' -- he "watermelon-seeded" ass first through the middle of the
tube. Afterward Rolf said, 'It didnt even hurt that bad.' "

All Tubing Photos By Eric Boomer

Rolf. Xtreeeem tuber.

Close crop of Rolf dropping.

Panned view of Rolf dropping.

Buried in the curtain, approaching terminal tube velocity, readying for painful impact.

So there you have it. I'm certainly no expert on these matters, but this is clearly not your garden variety, beer-swillin', cut-off Levi's wearin', redneck tubing .. & I think the dude's lucky his sacrum didn't end up in his esophagus. Moreover, can you imagine having the ever popular "sidecar" tube with the obligatory cooler-full 'o-Coors on this float? Dang! I'm gonna go ahead & assume that Rolf may well be a Guinness World Record contendah. At any rate, the proverbial bar has been raised.


In other "Dudes With German Names" news, Jan Dettmer, up on Van Island reports that he & crew hiked a long-ass way into STRATHCONA PARK to claim a wilderness 1D on the Moyeha River. Strathcona is home to numerous unexplored drainages, but is extremely remote with no road access. Here's what Jan had to say:

"I just came back from my second paddling trip. Shoulder is still pretty
bad but the day you left, the Gordon was awesome. Really friendly level
and I ran the Upper Middle without problem.

Sat to Mon I was on a exploratory run on the Moyeha River in Strathcona
Park. Oh my god! This must be the most beautiful place I have ever been
to. It is the last unlogged watershed on the island. We hiked into the
headwaters over the island divide for a day-and-a-half and then paddled
down into the ocean, where we got a boat pick-up to Tofino (an adventure
in itself!).

I walked 2 drops that were runnable but too risky with my shoulder. My
friend Jakub ran em both.

The whole river is Granite. The paddling is not that great but
worthwhile. The scenery was stunning. There was an unrunnable rapid that
had a natural Granite Bridge! I took over 300 pictures and have to dig
through them now... "

Here's a shot that Jan sent of him standing on the granite arch. I'm looking forward to seeing the rest!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Lucky for you that I will be blessing your backyard shortly. Then will I get to show you how it's done in Texas! You have heard that everything is BIGGER in these parts right?

Who really do you think Lance got those enhanced performance drugs from?